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terça-feira, 23 de março de 2010
DESABAFO SEMI-POLÍTICO
A política não entende a arte, a arte não entende a política. Pensamentos políticos e artístico até que se transitam, mas a arte e a política em sua verdadeira essência são totais desconhecidas uma pra outra, sem malícia nenhuma, só não são. Como duas pessoas já em idade adulta, cansadas de tudo o que é antigo, vivendo uma em cada extremo do mundo...
ARTE NÃO É POLÍTICA, DOA A QUEM DOER...
H.
quinta-feira, 11 de março de 2010
PUBLICAÇÃO EM VERMELHO "SANGUE-SECO"
Eu não conheço mais você!!!
Não conheço e não sei de nada!
Ao contrário do muito que você conhece de tudo, de todos e de si mesmo - do seu consciente ou inconsciente, eu digo que estou aqui fora vendo a chuva que cai dentro do mundo passar!
Não sei se quero e pra onde ir contigo!
Não sei onde posso me perder. Nem onde quero me encontrar...
Sei que tua coerência nem sempre combina com as minhas ventanias, e muitas vezes meu sangue fervente costuma não encontrar recipiente onde quer que seja em você.
Sossego não combina com minha mente, mas minha alma turbulenta precisa de sossego... sossego pra quem ama é cuidado... cuidado pra carente é abrigo... abrigo pra fortaleza é quase nada... sem fortaleza "quase nada" é turbulência... turbulência é o contrário de sossego e alma sossegada é só o que eu preciso!
Então não posso ficar contigo!*
*embora tua prensença me estremeça, tua companhia seja um sonho, teu peito um lugar seguro, teu sorriso um céu azul, e minha casa se faça presente cada vez que o verde dos teus olhos encontra o castanho dos meus...
Tem uma coisa de real e triste em ver o tempo passar. Nessas horas entendo o que Cyndi Lauper quis dizer com "Então me pergunto: quem deixou na chuva?". Mas o real sempre chega né? Ou não?
Às vezes acho que não sou daqui, ou que a felicidade que busco não existe...
Os dias passam e o desgaste mas do que tudo me faz acreditar que as coisas podem não dar certo... aliás essa é minha única certeza, que assim, não vai dar certo! Mas não mudo mais nada... agora, só deixo tudo seguir e seguir...
quinta-feira, 3 de setembro de 2009
Ideal
.
E ele andava sério pelas ruas de Buenos Aires. Umedecidas pela chuva, aquelas ruas conferiam àquela noite um ar mágico, com ares de amor eterno desses que se fazem amar mais a cada segundo.
O outro estava além da fronteira. Seu telefone era então uma arma mortal; um pouco mais que ficasse mudo era capaz de extraí-lo da realidade. Pousou a cabeça no travesseiro e deixou a mente devanear acerca de dados metereológicos, pois, vira ainda a pouco que chovia lá, além do Rio da Prata, e preferiu umaginar que o telefone se encontrava em coma por conta da chuva, “deve estar ruim de andar” pensava, “a chuva deve estar atrapalhando. Podem estar até sem luz por aquelas bandas”. Imaginava as mil coisas que podia ser: um raio, granizo, neve (neva lá?), trânsito caótico e bagunça nas ruas causada pela destruição que a chuva houvera desencadeado.
Ninguém devia advertí-lo disso… jamais, mas naquela noite na cidade do tango apenas chuviscava, com pancadas de chuva entre um chuvisco e outro, o que não impossibilitaria alguém de caminhar. Mas ele, ali em seu travesseiro, continuava seus devaneios… e o outro lá longe, caminhava pelas ruas a procura de um telefone! Tentara já alguns, tentara vários cartões e nada funcionava. Além de ter saído do conforto de sua hospedagem em meio ao aguaceiro, ainda correu muito pelas ruas em busca de um lugar aberto, em busca de uma pequena possibilidade de tentar falar com seu homem. A visão era apaixonante! Ele podia visualizar as gotas d`água escorrendo por aquele rosto másculo e belo de seu amado, gotas de desespero, gotas de amor! Gotas incômodas mas que foram aceitas em seu corpo em prol de um amor que deve ser lembrado, de uma voz que deve ser ouvida e uma saudade que deve ser sanada. A visão dele na chuva era realmente apaixonante! Apaixonante como outras cenas que se idealiza quando se ama, como alguém andando descalço para lhe ceder seus calçados, como alguém capaz de te esperar horas em algum lugar para te receber, te gostar sem botar defeito em nada, gostar das mesmas coisas, rir juntos, perceber a pessoa amando te olhar enquanto você se banha, essas coisas e outras mais.
E ele ia, úmido, chegando até uma cabine. Teclou um número extenso, internacional… e o telefone tocou! Quebrou o sonho sonhado do saudoso rapaz que ansiava pela ligação, para dar origem ao sonho real. Se tentasse lembrar, aquele rapaz sonhador não saberia nem como atendeu, a ansiedade era tanta que seu braço foi levado a atender o telefone por um impulso nervoso totalmente instintivo. Do outro lado uma voz não esperada, um qualquer, uma qualquer, não interessava - outrora até uma voz bem-vinda, agora uma sombra qualquer, não a de seu amado… dor.
Quase não ouviu sequer uma palavra que fora dita ao telefone tal era sua decepção, colocou o telefone no gancho e parou de idealizar naquele instante. Parou de sonhar com seu amado na rua, na chuva, só pra dar um telefonema (imagina só que bobagem!)… se sentiu um idiota agora. Voltando à realidade, era ridículo imaginar que essas coisas acontecem de verdade, que esse tipo de amor e de atitudes saem do campo das idéias: um amor mais que esperado, mais que sonhado, que mereceria todo o resto de uma existência (ou talvez mais, se houver) para ser vivido em sua completude, um amor idílico desses, etéreo, perfeito e incondicional.